In Which There are Moments
by Tek Sonay
Summary: A bit of fun, a bit of fluff: four unrelated one-shots involving our favorite HMC couple.
1. Spider Talk

a/n: While browsing through some old drafts, I came across these HMC scenes I did as writing warmups. Since I haven't posted any one-shots in a while, I thought I'd fix them up and share them for funsies! :) None of the one-shots are related.

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 _"In Which There are Moments"_

 **Spider Talk**

 _AUish, Humor/Romance, K+_

Howl gawked when Sophie turned to leave, her nose prim in the air like she had already won their argument. Which she hadn't. She hadn't even stayed long enough to properly start one! Leaning forward, blankets bunching in his lap, he grabbed her slender young fingers.

"Those _vermin_ , as you unkindly called them," he exclaimed, "are crucial to the community and mental health of this moving castle. They're long-term residents, botheration, they have rights! How do you think it reflects on me, the master of this castle, when you go charging into their nests and slaughtering their innocents?"

Sophie rolled her eyes. "They're just _spiders_ , Howl."

"This is a magic shop, dear, you can't assume anything. You wouldn't know it that they could actually be cursed, forced to eat insects, forever separated from their two-legged lovers." He released her with a dramatic sigh and collapsed against the pillows.

A familiar crease appeared between Sophie's brows. Good, she was considering it. He suppressed his amusement. Served her right! Of course none of the spiders were cursed, but he hated her killing them. After all, they were creatures to which he felt the most kinship: beautiful, reclusive…

He had just slipped into a lull when Sophie whacked the mattress by his head.

"Why, if that isn't the most absurd thing I've ever heard!" she said. "You would have told me if that were the case. Admit it, you're just trying to keep a friendly smidge of dirt around!"

Drat it all! Howl huffed. "If I didn't bathe twice a day, you wouldn't keep your hands off me. I've never seen anyone so obsessed with cleaning."

"It's not your body that needs cleaning, it's your wicked soul!" Sophie retorted, pink dusting her cheeks. "Now when are you going to get out of that bed? Don't think for a minute I actually believe you're sick."

"No mercy for humans, either," Howl sniffed. He snuggled under the covers and cracked an eye at her. "Don't you have snooping to get back to? Or are you planning on smothering me in my sleep like those poor spiders?"

"Why wait?"

The mattress dipped. Howl blinked to suddenly find Sophie hovering over him.

His breath caught in his throat when she pressed her cool hand over his mouth. Loose threads of silver hair floated like silk around her scowling face, but mischief glimmered in her eyes. Howl swallowed. Gracious, was it hot in here? He needed to have a word with Calcifer. Thank goodness he didn't have his heart; it'd be beating straight of his chest!

When Sophie's fingers slid to his cheek, he shivered.

"Mm. You're flushed. Perhaps you're sick after all." She frowned. She smoothed back his hair and stood. "Get some rest. Don't worry. I'll keep the slaughtering nice and quiet for you."

Howl wouldn't be honest if he claimed he watched strictly her back as she sashayed out the door (then again, when was he ever honest?). As things stood, it took his brain a full fifteen seconds to process what she had said.

His jaw dropped.

"May you be haunted by thousands of sticky little souls!" he shouted, gathering the blankets around himself and rushing barefoot to the top of the stairs.

"What's that? There are too many tiny cries of anguish, I can't hear you!" Sophie yelled back.

Howl tensed. "Markl!" he roared.

The boy shot out of his room.

"Make sure Sophie doesn't get carried away! Lives are at stake!"

With that, Howl lifted his nose in the air, marched back to his room, and tucked himself into bed again. A jeweled spider crawled high on the ceiling, threading itself among the glistening, dangling baubles. "Hah! That woman forgot to look up."

He touched his lips and begrudgingly smiled. Not that he'd minded the alternative.

They'd have to have another spider talk soon.

 _-fin-_


	2. Wizard Trap

a/n: This one winks at The Enchanted Forest Chronicles. A delightful series if you're ever interested!

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 _"In Which There are Moments"_

 **Wizard Trap**

 _Post-movie, Humor/Romance, K+_

"Are you certain this will work?" Sophie asked, bending precariously over the railing to reach the bucket rigged over the front door.

"Yeah, now pour the lemon juice in slowly," Calcifer replied. The fire demon snickered, watching the young woman follow his instructions. Innocent Sophie. This was going to be good.

She recorked the bottle and settled back on her heels. "And this will really stop any wicked sorts, like genies and such?"

"This spell would stop even Suliman!" Calcifer crowed. _And also a certain wizard who - despite regaining his heart - can be pretty insensitive._

"I hope so," Sophie sighed. She adjusted the headscarf over her short, silver hair and trudged back to the worktable, where a lump of dough had been left to rise. For the last four days she had been moping around the new flying castle, waiting for Howl to return from the capital where he was inspecting post-war restorations. Maybe she'd be less miserable if she knew that Howl was already headed their way.

Calcifer would be less miserable, too. Her missing him wasn't the problem; it was the way she expressed it. Young Sophie was still the same old Sophie. That meant shouting, hitting things with her broom, and crying, _always_ the crying. Since Markl was now attending public school during the day, Calcifer had thought he'd be a nice star and keep Sophie company until the wizard got back.

Big mistake.

"Calcifer?" She had that sappy, far-away look in her eyes again.

 _Oh boy._

"Do you think Howl misses me?"

 _Here we go._

"I mean," she sniffed, big globes of tears hovering at the corners of her eyes, "does he even like me? He volunteered an entire week!"

"I dunno, maybe he got cold feet." Calcifer dodged a flying clump of dough. "Sheesh, whaddaya want me to say?"

"If he sees no problem with wandering off, then maybe I don't need to be here," Sophie declared, wiping her eyes and smearing flour across her cheek in the process. "As soon as Markl gets home, we're going straight to my mother's."

"Won't that surprise him," Calcifer snickered. He perked up when he detected a noise outside. Was that…?

"Let him feel what it's like!"

The front door was suddenly thrown open.

Sophie whirled in time to witness her "long lost" love disappear under a downpour of soapy, lemony water. The bucket emptied in seconds, dribbling its last sudsy contents onto the shocked wizard.

"What in the blazes!" Howl spluttered.

Calcifer roared with laughter.

Sophie was stunned, but after a moment her own giggles poured out. Soon she and the fire demon were clutching their stomachs at the sight of Howl dripping in the entryway, his bewildered eyes staring at them through plastered hair. Great globs of foam slid off his shoulders.

Howl waved his hand. The watery mess instantly disappeared.

Sophie gasped. "That's not fair!"

"Not fair? Not fair?" Howl stalked up the stairs, immaculate as ever. "How fair is being accosted in my own home?"

"It wasn't me…" Sophie glanced meaningfully towards Calcifer before snapping her attention back to the rapidly approaching wizard. She ducked behind the worktable and squeaked when Howl followed.

"I thought you'd miss me!" Howl complained.

"Well, you should've made sure of that before you left!"

Howl tackled her onto the sette. "Shall I make sure now?"

Calcifer snorted as the two made lovey-dovey eyes at each other. "Yeah, missed ya, too, Howl. Where's my kiss?"

"I'm sorry, Cal, did you want one?" Sophie asked innocently.

"That's right, _you're_ the one I should be thanking for that homecoming present," Howl said, a glint in his eye. "As I recall, you promised to keep my early return a secret."

"Calcifer, you _knew_?"

"You deserved that sousin', ya goof," the fire demon replied. "Should've seen her, Howl. Cryin' herself to sleep, starin' miserably at the moon..."

The wizard immediately returned his attention to the woman in his arms. "My dear Sophie!"

She turned pink.

When the humans' faces drew close, Calcifer decided it was time to get scarce. After all, Howl's secret wasn't the only one he had kept...

A few minutes later, the front door flew open again.

A tiny figure skipped inside.

"Sophie, I'm home early!" Markl cried.

 _-fin-_


	3. Strictly Spiritual

_"In Which There are Moments"_

 **Strictly Spiritual**

 _Post-movie, Humor/Romance, T_

Her handsome new husband chuckled against her mouth.

Sophie frowned and pulled back. Why was he laughing at her kissing? Was it that bad?

"Uh oh. I just gave you a mind-boggling kiss, and you start overthinking?" Howl teased.

"I am not overthinking!" Sophie huffed. To Howl's astonishment, she threw her arms over his shoulders and drew him down for a few more impassioned seconds. When she finally released him, he blinked owlishly at her.

"There," Sophie panted in triumph. "If Hatters are anything, they're stubborn." She grinned at him. Her eyes widened when he suddenly scooped her into his arms.

"Well, my sweetheart," Howl announced breathlessly, much to Sophie's delight, "I am looking forward to seeing if I can outlast that stubbornness of yours tonight."

Sophie turned a flaming red. She clung to Howl's neck as he began trekking up their creaky wooden stairs, her wedding gown sweeping the treads. "Am I to be carried like an elderly woman?" she scoffed to mask her embarrassment.

"Certainly not!" Howl cheered. "You are simply far too tempting and desirable a wife to leave alone until we are both perfectly… satisfied." Even his face was turning pink.

"In a strictly spiritual way, of course," he added cheekily, earning him a swat. "Oh dear, were you thinking of some other enjoyable pastime?" He laughed at the second swat and kicked the bedroom door closed behind them. He found his teasing quite forgotten when Sophie tugged his head down a second time.

"Welcome home, Mrs. Pendragon," he murmured several moments later.

 _-fin-_


	4. It's Not So Bad

a/n: Last one! This is more somber than the others.

**Also, if anyone's written a story with Markl as a main character, he's officially been added to the HMC character list. The Fanfiction staff wanted me to spread the word that only the characters that are chosen by the authors will show up during browsing. So any characters that aren't selected by us authors won't show up during character/pairing searches.

Thank you, James Birdsong! :)

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 _"In Which There are Moments"_

 **It's Not So Bad**

 _AUish movie verse, Comfort/Romance, K+_

Howl crouched on the shingled peak, eyes hooded against the dry, restless wind that rasped across the metal sides of his castle. A starless sky domed overhead, and the wasteland stretched out bare and meaningless. It could swallow a person whole, the emptiness of this place.

Another gust. Howl's feathers – choppy, hideous, smothering – crackled and rippled along his skin. The cursed man shivered.

These days it seemed like his humanity had collected at the bottom of a deep glass, pouring into him whenever he threw back his head, but a vessel can only hold so much. One day there would be nothing left but taunting, glistening drops. Maybe Calcifer was right. Maybe he had gone too far this time. But Howl could not bring himself to care.

No... that wasn't right. He cared more than he ever had before.

Funny, that he should lose his humanity in the pursuit of it.

"Howl?" A gently timbered voice floated like a tentative thread. He saw a faint shimmer through the striped awning beneath him.

Sophie.

Grace and kindness and pride.

Shame washed over him as she called out his name.

The light drifted closer. A bare hand gripped the railing, followed by a long, brown, swinging braid as the woman leaned out. "Howl." Her young face flickered under the guttering of her candle. "What are you doing up there? Come here."

He stiffened. Let her falter and mistake him for some giant night creature. He could not face her, not like this.

But as the air stretched thick between them, and she continued to wait with that stubborn tenacity of hers, wisps of brown hair blowing over her face, he grimaced.

Could he deny her anything?

His wings flashed across the empty sky. A moment later, the balcony shuddered. Metal bars clinked from the grip of his claws as he climbed into Sophie's sheltered space, the dense shadows of his monstrous frame casting a disturbing contrast to her smaller stature. In her hand, the tiny fire clinging to the charcoaled wick lashed once and then faded. Sophie set the candle on the floor and approached to him slowly. Her toes peeked under the hem of her fluttering pink nightdress: round-topped, smooth, unlike the curving sharpness of his talons.

"Does it hurt?" she whispered.

His body? His spirit?

Her concern softened him. "It's not so bad," he said, grateful that his voice remained unaffected.

Sophie stepped closer. Howl instinctively arched his wings around her, the feathery tips shuddering near her shoulder blades. Her fingers reached towards his face. He shivered at the cool touch of her skin against his scaly jaw.

"No wonder you've been exhausted," she murmured, a frown quirking her mouth which Howl wanted to kiss into a smile. She nudged him. With reluctance he dragged his gaze upwards. His chest ached hollowly at the sadness and compassion he found in her deep gray eyes.

"I love you."

Howl froze.

Tears were suddenly wetting Sophie's cheeks as the woman lifted herself on her toes. "I don't care if you're a monster. You're the most beautiful person I've ever met," she whispered in the warm space between them before brushing her lips over his.

A tremble began in the back of his neck when Sophie wrapped herself around him and buried her face in his broad, feathery chest. His limbs felt warm like he had been basking in the sun instead of brooding in cold darkness. His feathery arms shook as they circled her. Tentative of his claws, he returned her embrace. Sophie… his Sophie. She was so perfect.

She _loved him_.

The quiet night air rushed into his lungs as he crushed her to him, cocooning them fully beneath his great, inky wings. The flowery scent of her hair soothed his spirit. He pressed his lips to her brow and felt her sigh.

Even if his humanity ran dry as the wasteland, or burned to ashes along with the rest of this violent world, even if his heartless self dissolved into the numb fate that was the only promise of his beastly form, he would no longer be a coward and run away.

Because this was worth protecting.

 _-fin-_


End file.
